...So I Guess That's a "No"

Well, it looks like I started a new cycle this morning. I had allowed myself to get my hopes up, so now I'm feeling a little down. That cycle was so odd. I should have had a dip in temperature this morning or yesterday morning to indicate that this new cycle was starting, but that didn't happen. Today would have been day 35, but now it's day 1. I've never gone past 30 days before.

Status Unknown

Today is day 32 of my cycle, which has never gone past 30 days in the time that I've been charting (except, of course, for the time that I spent pregnant). I took a pregnancy test this morning, though, and it said I'm not pregnant. If there's still no sign of my period at this time next week, I'll take the test again. I wish I knew what was happening.

I just looked up hysterical pregnancy (it's known by several names, but the medical name is Pseudocyesis, which literally means false pregnancy) because I was concerned that that's what I'm experiencing. But according to Wikipedia, "The hallmark sign of pseudocyesis that is common to all cases is that the affected patient is convinced that she is pregnant." So since I'm worried that this is what I'm going through, that apparently means it isn't what I'm going through.

So now I guess I just have to wait and see what happens.

Who Knows?

I've been feeling "different" the last few days. It has only been 21 days since my most recent period started, so it's too soon to test whether or not I'm feeling different because I'm pregnant. And frankly, it's at the front of my mind right now. I don't want to get excited just to be disappointed again, so instead, I'm just feeling nervous and unsettled.

I've read that women who are really in tune to their bodies can feel a slight pain when they ovulate. I felt something akin to a cramp, but far more mild, on day 14, and my temperature dipped on day 15. It hasn't sprung back up again, which could indicate that insemination occurred or could just indicate that my body is out of whack this month and I haven't ovulated yet. Also, I've been a little queasy at times during the last three days, and I can't find any other reason for that.

If I am pregnant, and that's a big "if," today is day 20.